Writing The Dream Prison

[CloudlessRayne]

This is a story I have been working on and hope to get published in the near by future, so please critique.

Series Title: Dream vs Reality
Book Title: The Dream Prison
Genre: Young adult fiction, Fantasy
Summary: The Dream World has always existed along side the Real World, even without our knowledge. For a long time everything was peaceful there. Twelve people gifted with an element (earth, air, fire, water, light, darkness, beast, machine, death, life, time, and space) ruled the world in harmony. Until ten of them died. The Divine Leader took charge of the world while the Space Consoler, Xavier, became the Leader's advisor. Years past and the reincarnations are born, but will they except the rule? Will the Divine Leader even let them rule? Or... Will the Divine Leader suceed in taking over the Real World? The fate of both worlds lays in the hands of these ten kids that are scattered.

Prologue: The Search Begins (1,819 words)

Spoiler

Most stories start at the beginning, but this one starts twelve years before that. This story begins with the past. You see, one day changed the fate of ten children. This in turn changed the fate of an entire world. The day I speak of saved the Real World for a span of twelve years. Now the ten are moving again, but first you must know what happened on that day in the past.

It was a dark and stormy night; well actually it wasn’t that way it all. In fact it was a bright and sunny morning and everyone was going about their normal business in the Dream World. In the castle on the central continent the Divine Leader sat listening to the report of the different regions.

“The East Sector of the Central Continent is once again having difficulties controlling the Growler population. The beasts are eating the villager’s women and children,” began Xavier as he read off of a large scroll. Xavier liked scrolls; they seemed so much more official than a normal stack of papers. “Because of the killings the population of the village is de--” Xavier was cut off as the door behind him opened.

Through the door came a messenger from the committee for finding the ten reincarnations. With his entrance both of the two figures grew silent and anxious. The man was breathing heavy, for he wasn’t exactly physically fit. In fact, he was quite the opposite.

The Divine Leader was beginning to lose patience and leaned forward in anticipation. “Well, are you going to continue wasting my time or will you present your report?” The figure wore a long black cloak that hid the pale skin and the face was shrouded in a shadow. The only distinguishable characteristic was the one glowing red eye that peered out from the left side of the leader’s face.

The awkward man bowed in a hurry as he took in another deep breath to try and steady himself. “All ten reincarnations of the Twelve Consolers have been gathered together in the castle,” the messenger said, proud of himself, as shock filled the room.

It had been about 200 years since ten of the twelve consolers had died from the disaster that no one dared mention. Once they had passed away, one of the survivors went into hiding while the other appointed The Divine Leader to take charge of the world until the reincarnations were born and ready to accept their responsibility.

Finally the reincarnations were all born and they could be taught their role in the world. “Bring me to them,” the Divine Leader said as she stood to her feet. The man nodded and walked out the door, the Divine Leader close behind. At a slight distance Xavier followed suit.

“What are their ages?” asked the leader.

“They are all very young. The machine boy is four, the life girl and air boy are 3, both light and dark reincarnations are two, fire, water, and death are only one years of age, and that leaves the beast child and earth child to be under one year old.”

The Divine Leader nodded and listened to every word, committing it to memory. Xavier on the other hand was not paying attention. The group of three was moving down hallway after hallway of the castle at a brisk pace. All the while Xavier was mumbling to himself.

“Not all ten… Grimm’s revenge is not good… This can’t be happening… I need help… Other survivor….” The mumblings continued on and on and made close to no sense. Close, because they made perfect sense to Xavier.

They were nearing the door now and Xavier followed reluctantly. He needed to stop them and he had to do it as soon as possible. Suddenly in front of him the two stopped moving forward. No, they stopped moving all together.

The sight in front of the man was unusual and would have frightened anyone, but Xavier merely grinned. “When can you say a normal hello?” Xavier asked the silent hallway. He must have appeared mad, talking to the hallway, but he had a reason. “Chloe, come on out already,” he added.

The door that the Divine Leader and messenger were about to enter opened up and a blonde head appeared. Soon the young women in maid’s clothing had quietly shut the door behind her and walked past the still figures. She stopped right in front of Xavier, obviously not happy.

“Your job was simple. Keep our wonderful leader here away from the children!” the maid said rudely pointing to the cloaked figure. “How in the world, did she get all ten?” asked Chloe, straining to keep her voice down and not yell at him.

Xavier responded with a tense laugh. “How come you are always the one scolding me?” he asked with a frown. “Wasn’t your job to make sure they stayed hidden, but looky there! Ten children all lined up for the Leader’s picking,” Xavier hissed through clenched teeth.

Chloe shook her head in disappointment at Xavier’s response. The young woman obviously expected more from the elder man. “I had to find them before I could protect them from the Leader. Also, if you didn’t know, taking care of ten children is very hard. Anyway, we need to stop arguing and think of a solution,” Chloe concluded, changing the topic to the more dire issue.

An awkward silence fell over the two individuals as they tried to come up with some way out of their sticky situation. It simply wasn’t possible. The silence lengthened and Xavier caught small beads of sweat on Chloe’s forehead.

“How much longer?” asked Xavier as he gestured to the unmoving messenger and leader. Xavier was honestly concerned with Chloe’s ability to keep time at a standstill. Time was something they could not afford to let slip through their finger tips yet again.

Chloe smiled weakly. “I can keep this up for as long as we need. I am not weak like you may presume. Anyway, we must think of a plan,” Chloe whispered, her pale blue eyes searching for an answer.

Suddenly a grin spread across her face. “I think I have the answer we are looking for,” Chloe whispered, immediately grabbing Xavier’s attention. “We simply need to send the children somewhere else! How much power do you have right now? Have you recovered?” Chloe asked in a hurry.

The young woman was filled with excitement. They may have a solution to give the children some time to grow, but all too soon the time would come for them to fight. Chloe and Xavier could only hope the time wasn’t too soon.

Xavier frowned slightly at the wording of her questions. “No, I have not ‘recovered’,” he hissed in annoyance. He did not have a disease that needed recovering from. His condition wasn’t like that and Chloe knew all too well. Xavier couldn’t let his anger get to him now though. The lives of the ten children and then another world were currently at stake. Xavier’s anger quickly melted away.

“What is your plan?” he asked at last, his brown eyes staring at the blonde haired woman. With a smile she explained. Her planned seemed simple enough. The two of them would use their gifts as two of the consolers. Chloe was the consular of time while Xavier was the consular of space.

The plan consisted mainly of Xavier’s hard work. He was to bend the space around the children and, in essence, teleport them away. Teleport them to somewhere safe. Chloe was to set off a small smoke bomb as the Divine Leader entered to allow Xavier the time to send them away. Now for the plan to be put into action.

Chloe quickly opened the door and slipped back to the other side. In a matter of seconds the two people in front of Xavier began to move once again towards the door. The messenger put his hand on the door and turned the handle.

As he pulled it open smoke came billowing out of the room, coughing, he shut the door. “What is going on?” asked the Divine Leader in annoyance as access to the room was denied. The smoke would have to clear.

Xavier took a deep breath and concentrated. He felt the small tingle of his powers rush through his veins as he bent the space on the other side of the door. He couldn’t control it. It was just too much. With a last effort he didn’t bother trying to teleport them to a certain location and just hoped for the best.

“The smoke should be clear now,” the messenger whispered as he opened the door and the three hurried inside. Remnants of the smoke was still on the floor of the room, but it had cleared enough for them to see what was there, or rather lack thereof. “I-I’m telling you…They were here,” the messenger mumbled in his defense.

The room contained sloppy makeshift beds, discarded bottles, and many blankets. Standing amongst the messy room stood one blonde hair maid. In her right arm was a blanket and in her left hand was a bottle. Only moments ago a baby had been drinking from the bottle. “T-They vanished,” Chloe stumbled in horror and surprise.

Any signs of the leader remaining calm were long gone. “Find those kids. I want them back here where they belong,” hissed the Divine Leader through clenched teeth before turning around and storming back towards the door only to stop at the doorway. “Those children must learn their jobs as consolers, so find them fast,” the leader concluded before leaving their sight.

The messenger looked across the room a few times before nervously exiting. He had a lot of work to do to find the children. For all he knew they could be absolutely anywhere. With his departure that left only Chloe and Xavier in the room.

“So, Xavier,” Chloe began, “where did you send them?”

Xavier was silent for a while before finally clearing his throat. “I do not know. They could be in this world or the Real World. I honestly don’t know,” Xavier whispered sadly.

Chloe tried her hardest to appear unaffected by those words. Not knowing where the children were could prove to be difficult. “Well, we must begin our own search then. The Divine Leader mustn’t find them first,” Chloe said. Those were the last words spoken between the two for some time. The maid left the castle in a hurry and was never to be seen again.

Xavier, on the other hand, continued to work alongside the Divine Leader. He used the Leader’s resources to find traces of the children. The search had officially started. Twelve years have now passed. The children are beginning to realize their powers, but one question remains. Who will find them first?

 

[DNA]

It might almost feel boring to read all this over again, but a promise is a promise!

Most stories start at the beginning, but this one starts twelve years before that. This story begins with the past.

This almost seems redundant in a way. The beginning then would be twelve years before...something. I dunno, it just seems worded very awkwardly and a bit disjointed.

You see, one day changed the fate of ten children. This in turn changed the fate of an entire world.

You could combine these into one sentence by changing 'this' to 'which'.

It was a dark and stormy night; well actually it wasn’t that way it all.

sounds unnecessary

“The East Sector of the Central Continent is once again having difficulties controlling the Growler population. The beasts are eating the villager’s women and children,” began Xavier as he read off of a large scroll.

Who's Xavier? He hasn't been introduced yet; mind doing so? (Yes, you know I know who Xavier is, but no one can tell just from this.)

The Divine Leader nodded and listened to every word, committing it to memory.

I think it's 'them', not 'it'.

Soon the young women in maid’s clothing

woman, singular

The sight in front of the man was unusual and would have frightened anyone, but Xavier merely grinned. “When can you say a normal hello?” Xavier asked the silent hallway. He must have appeared mad, talking to the hallway, but he had a reason. “Chloe, come on out already,” he added.

It's incredibly hard to tell that, by the time this conversation has begun, Xavier's walked off from the Divine Leader and the other guy. I didn't figure it out until five lines later, and it confused me that the DL could hear all this. Then it struck me that she isn't. Fix it

“How much longer?” asked Xavier as he gestured to the unmoving messenger and leader. Xavier was honestly concerned with Chloe’s ability to keep time at a standstill.

Wait, she can stop time? So THAT'S why? It's even more unclear.

~~~~

Introduction seems a little clearer than I remember it being the last time around; the only real issue I can see is that things are explained later than they should be, and sometimes with insufficient detail - for example, the time-stopping thing. It said they stopped moving; I assumed the two of them had stopped in the hallway to talk about something and were oblivious to their surroundings, but that wasn't the case. That's the biggest culprit for this prologue; I don't know if it exists in later chapters but I hope not.

I'm not sure what else I should say at this point in the story, other than keep up the good work!

 

[CloudlessRayne]

Thanks DNA Sorry that is confusing, maybe I didn't balence it right. I dont want to tell the reader everything up front. Things are for them to figure out or learn with the main characters, usually you would get the 'back of the book' summary first though Anyway basically what you needed to take from the prologue was that the Dream World has twelve people that have a gift and when the reincarnations were born, they were scattered. Twelve years have now past and they have been living their lives, some with out any knowledge of The Dream World. Oh, and Chloe is the Time Consoler (Controls time), while Xavier is the Space Consoler (controls Space). DL is still mystery.

Next bit is Chapters 1-4 originally one chapter but split for the purpose of cliff hangers and whatnots.

Spoiler

One: The Beginning of the End
~Night Zero~

Everything has a beginning, even the end. Although being able to tell where something new begins and where something old ends can be difficult, but in the case of this story there is a central turning point. Where? Well, it all began with the rash actions of one girl. A girl who named herself Hope.

Hope had always felt like an outcast, which wasn’t too far off from the truth. She was the only humanoid member of the Dream World, as far as she knew, who remained ‘Untainted’. Oh, how she hated the term, but it still wasn’t the worst thing they had called her. She hated being ‘worthless’. If she was so worthless then why did the Divine Leader bother keeping her around? It just made no sense at all.

Today she was trying another one of her many escape attempts. Being kept in the Untainted Territory on the outskirts of the palace all alone was not luxury. She was only alone because no one dared to step foot on the land set up for those who don’t have a mark. Only one person dared to visit her.

Delilah’s visits were probably the only thing Hope was going to miss if she made it out of the Dream World successfully. After years of planning and many failed attempts she had finally perfected an escape plan. Tonight she was going to succeed.

The sunset was absolutely beautiful. The glowing orb melted behind the dark black castle, the action causing the whole sky to change colors. She crept closer to the castle’s drawbridge as she watched the scenery.

“Heh,” Hope whispered under her breath as she watched the sunset. “It’s like you are saying goodbye to me sun,” she laughed a bit to herself. Her rash actions might just result in her death, but she no longer cared. What was the point in living if you didn’t like where you were or what you did every day? Risking her life for a change was completely okay with her.

The draw bridge began to move up towards the sky. It had taken forever for the timing to line up perfectly. Tonight the guards were in the middle of a shift change while the bridge went up, perfect for Hope.

As the wooden bridge lifted from the ground, she gripped the wood riding it upwards. She felt her feet leave the ground causing her to tighten her grip. Her hands turned white from the strain as the draw bridge moved to a stop. Hanging vertical, she listened to the sounds of the guards on the other side.

“Hurry up,” Hope hissed under her breath as the guards began to move inside. The clank of their heavy armor echoing as they retreated into the castle, ever so slowly Finally. Finally they had retreated inside.

Quickly the girl pulled herself up until she was sitting on top of the draw bridge. Below her was the hard stone entrance path. She made it to the castle. Hope pushed herself gently and slid, or rather fell, down the other side of the drawbridge.

Landing with a soft ‘thump’ she looked around one more time. No one had seen her, she was safe. As fast and as quietly as she could, she entered the castle. The castle was beautifully horrifying and took her breath away.

The opened room had many hallways merging off of it that went to corridor after corridor of the huge castle. Hope couldn’t help but think that the Divine Leader was in one of those rooms. Even though she wasn’t a true member of the Dream World, she still respected their ruler.

Voices were coming closer, the new guards. Hope hid behind the closest statue of who knew what as she listened to the voices. The castle was so dark at night. It had been designed to use the sun as its main source of light so the torches that lit the halls were few.

“I don’t understand why we have to guard the castle; no one is coming in,” mumbled one of the guards in annoyance. “I have better things to do, like training those dang scouts.”

“We do what we are told and don’t complain,” a second voice replied, “You know the stories of when our Leader is mad… Just don’t risk it. Don’t risk dying,” the man mumbled. Their voices were fading now and eventually out of ear shot.
Phase one of Hope’s plan had been completed successfully.

Still situated behind the statue she quietly moved her hand to her pocket. Map. Slowly, she pulled out the folded square. Delilah had helped her make this map of the castle and it was finally time for Hope to use it.

She opened it up slowly and cringed a bit at the loud crinkling sound of paper it would make from time to time. The light was dim and Hope struggled to read the map. After staring at the piece of paper for some time, she finally was able to trace the path she needed to take with her finger.

“Please work,” Hope whispered to the air as she returned the map to her pocket. After making sure the coast was clear, which it was, she moved out from behind the statue and down one of the long corridors to the right of the entrance.

The winding hallway seemed never ending, but soon she arrived at a large archway. Along the pillars of the arc where carvings of almost everything; dragons, beasts, villages, elves, fairies, ect. In the center of the arc three words where engraved deeply into the material.

THE DREAM ROOMS​

 

Two: Door After Door
~Night Zero~​

Hope read the three words quickly and had to bite her tongue to stop her from cheering out loud. She had made it to the West sector of the castle. She was almost done with her mission that she had set out on.

The fourteen year old girl happily and quickly crossed under the arc and was soon on the other side. Whatever she had been expecting…this was not it. On the other side of the arch way were two large doors.

The doors were about twenty feet tall at the highest point which was at the center. The doors seemed to open at the middle where a thin line was visible all the way down the door. The torches situated in-between and to the side of the doors gave it enough light to read two gold plaques.

Ignoring the height of the doors, Hope stood up on her tip-toes to read the plaques that were ten feet off of the ground. The door on the left read ‘Head Quarters’ and the large door on the right read ‘Dormitories’, she frowned as she debated which door to enter.

Hope was getting frustrated. The whole situation of two doors to choose from and not knowing which one to go through reminded her of a riddle. The riddle consisted of two men standing in front of the paths. One told lies, the other always told the truth. With only asking one question you were to choose the right path. She would have loved if there was someone for her to ask.

Sadly, you don’t always get what you want. She stared at the doors and began a small game of eeny-meeny-miny-moe. Her finger came to a stop pointing to the left door. So that was the way she would go.

Quietly, Hope reached forward and gave the right side of the large door a small push that slowly opened the door. The door slid open smoothly, brushing across the floor. She just stood there and watched as the other side of the door became visible to her.

Complete disappointment. The entire room was pitch-black. Apparently whoever used this room would bring their own light. “And I was planning to save my energy,” Hope mumbled sadly as she entered the room.

Once on the other side, she pushed the door shut. She couldn’t have any one finding her, now could she? Taking a deep breath Hope began to focus. Using her powers had always taken an extreme amount of concentration for her.

The tingling feeling rushed through her body and her eyes shut as she felt the magic. Opening her eyes once again, Hope looked at her hands. “Glow,” she whispered in the silent room.

Almost immediately her hands began to glow, brighter than the torches. She grinned, nearly laughing to herself. The power wasn’t worthless like the Divine Leader had said countless times; in fact, it was going to help her in her escape.

Using her hands as flashlights, she began her investigation of the room. In front of her stood multiple doors at around fifteen feet tall. She was astonished at how the doors were each a different color (red, orange, yellow, green, blue, indigo, and then violet).

She then looked away from the doors and turned around to face the door she had entered from. On the right side of the door was a map of a world. Hope frowned as she tried to remember why the map was so familiar. It was different from the ones of the Dream World which consisted of four continents around the central continent.

“Earth/Real World,” she whispered to herself as she read the heading above the map. “I heard about this once in the history class,” Hope added in shock. Who knew she would have learned something useful if she had paid attention?
She hadn’t known.

Hope turned away from the map and searched the long room. “Where are you?” she hissed into the air. She would fail if she couldn’t find the device. On the other side of the door she had entered from, she found what she was looking for.

In a hurry, the young girl moved across the room to where the device was located. It hung from a peg that was pushed into the wall and Hope was able to remove it easily. The device was a small rectangle that was about five by two inches. Along the top were hinges showing that it flipped open. The cold material changed colors as her fingers brushed across it gently.

She forced her attention back to the doors, seven to choose from and not much time to do so. The young girl stared at the plaques on the doors. Complete nonsense. Urope, Asha, and other words that made no sense to Hope.

Turning around, she stared at the map once again. There had to be a correlation, right? Why else would the map be there? Hope only had to find this correlation. The map’s land forms were labeled with names. Names that made no sense…

With a grin, she compared the two names, they were the same. Her eyes squinted as she attempted to read a few. “Europe… Africa,” a frown stopped her in her tracks. Knowing the names would not help her.

Now to pick one. Hope turned around to the map and quickly shut her eyes. Darkness engulfed her vision and she lifted a finger. Waving it in front of the map she randomly placed it on a location.

Curiously, she opened her eyes and found that her finger was placed on the land mass labeled ‘North America’. Without delay Hope turned back to the seven doorways. She walked in front of the doors, scanning the names of the plaque quickly before moving on.

The second to last door, the indigo one, read North America. She had reached her destination. The girl gently rested her hand on the door before noticing that they were still glowing. Hope took a deep breath and slowly exhaled as she watched the light dim.

It was a safety precaution. Someone could be on the other side of this door and if they found her nothing good would come from her adventure into the castle. Slowly she eased the large indigo door open.

On the other side of the doorway were, believe it or not, more doors. Three this time. Each one was twelve feet high and six feet wide, just like the previous doors. To her left and right any traces of the rainbow doors was gone, besides the indigo one she had walked through.

Hope wasn’t too surprised at this for the reality of ‘space’ and ‘area’ was warped to allow more things to be in a little space. A certain magic that had been set up by the Space consular himself, she grinned at her ability to remember the random trivia from school.

Three doors with silver plaques, instead of the usual gold, stood in front of her. She crept closer to the carvings and tried to read what they spelled.

“Canada,” Hope whispered the name of the carving out loud. The word was strange and felt unfamiliar on her tongue.

“United States of America,” she had a hard time saying the name and frowned at the length. “Why is it so long?” Hope asked the empty air. “It’s a mouthful,” she added before moving on to the next door.

“Last door is Mexico,” she said as she stepped back from the doors. Why was she reading the names? She didn’t know, but it was cutting into her valuable time.

Left, right, or middle. Three choices to choose from and not enough time to care. Without a second thought, Hope went through the middle door as quickly as she could. Hopefully she was nearing the end of her journey into the castle.

Hope blinked as she took in the sight of the corridor in front of her. The long hallway stretched out as far as she could see. In the distance the corridor just faded, no end at all.

The all black hallway was brought to life with the series of torches on her left. On the right silver plaques were placed on dark wood doors. Each door was large in size and the amount was more than she could count.

“That’s a lot of doors,” Hope whispered in shock before shaking her head and moving forward once again. Each door had a strange name written on it. Alabama, Alaska, Arizona, and so on, so forth.

Not wanting to waste any more precious time, Hope entered the door labeled Arizona. Nothing could have prepared her for what was on the other side. She was well aware of how the Dream World interacted with the Real World, but the sight would have shocked anyone.
 

Three: Finishing The Mission
~Night Zero~​

Rows and rows of metal beds stretched out for as far as Hope could see in every direction. Most of the beds were empty, but on a few were flickering images of sleeping people. The Dream Dormitories. She had arrived.

Her grip tightened around the rectangle object she had taken from a few entrances ago. This small rectangle with the top that changed colors held so much power. With this object, she was going to risk everything.

With a calming breath, Hope began to move past some of the beds. She needed to find someone asleep. Walking past empty bed after empty bed she finally arrived at the foot of a bed with someone asleep lying on top.

She glanced over her shoulder; the door was in plain view. That wasn’t safe. Hope moved away from the bed and went deeper into the surrounding mass of metal beds. She could not afford to have someone find her now, not when she was this close.

Her eyes stayed on the door until she was a fair distance away from it. Just a small speck now, Hope believed she was safe. Now, back to her mission in the Dream Dormitories, she needed to find someone.

Bed after bed was empty. Why weren’t more people asleep? This wasn’t working for Hope. Finally she caught sight of a few sleeping figures. As quickly as she could, Hope shortened the distance between her and the flickering images of the people.

Once at the foot of the bed, Hope noticed the small sign that was attached. A name and barcode. Quickly, she flipped open the small rectangle and held the multicolored back up to the plaque.

A small section from the back opened up and a light came from the object. The light ran up and down the barcode before retreating back into the device. Once the light was gone the top screen lit up.

Information scrolled up the screen:

“Jenson, Chris
Gilbert, Arizona
Age- 11
Fears- Bufonophobia
Hopes/Wishes- World class bird breeder or muppeteer
Extra- too young to be one of the ten”

Hope read the entry, a little freaked out about the young boy’s answers. They were not normal, that’s for sure. Without a second though she moved on to another sleeping figure and scanned the barcode as well.

Time was running out, she would have to choose someone soon. With that in mind she looked down at the information on the screen.

“Knight, Luke
Gilbert, Arizona
Age- 14
Fears- Necrophobia, Lygophobia, Phobophobia, Kakorrhaphiophobia, Coulrophobia, Taphephobia Taphophobia, Potamophobia, Alpacas, and more…
Hopes/Wishes- To be able to do something useful and meaningful
Extra-No way, this child is way too pathetic to be one of the ten”

Hope read the words with interest. “Wow, you’re useless to them as well. Nice to have company on the worthless spectrum,” she said with a small smile spreading across her lips. Company would be nice.

The kid did have fears though, and a lot at that. Hope honestly believed the kid had to be talented to have that many fears already at the age of 14. “I made my decision. I will unlock you,” she decided.

She began the process immediately. It had to be completed before he awoke and Hope could not be caught. Her finger ran across the bottom screen. The small action brought the bottom screen to life. A number pad appeared and she began to type in a long code.

The code to ‘unlock’, as Hope referred to the process, was long and difficult. Her fingers moved across the screen as different colors appeared and changed. This process would change Luke Knight’s life forever.

Hope grinned, finished. “See you tomorrow night,” she whispered to the boy that was her age. “You will definitely find it interesting on this side,” the girl added. As her words drew to an end, Hope shut the device.

Time to return. she left the room full of beds and quickly returned through the doors she had come from. She placed the rectangular object back into its spot and then left the castle. Hope was returning to the small place she called home, located in ‘Untainted’ Territory.
 

Four: Nightmares Are No Fun
~Night Zero~​

Luke Knight had no recollection of how his dream started, but he will always remember the overwhelming darkness. The darkness that was so thick he could feel it all around him. It was surrounding him, trapping him.

He was afraid of the dark, everything representing death, and the sorts. Luke had deemed all of those things as evil and deadly. Deadly things were scary, hence his fear of them. At least that was his reason for fearing the dark.

Nightmares were his nemesis. Always showing his fears to him, mocking him. Oh, Luke dreaded falling asleep every night. He had nightmares so often that he no longer differentiate between dreams and nightmares. Every time he fell asleep he had a nightmare, just that simple.

This one was different though. The darkness seemed to actually be suffocating him, actually hurting him. This nightmare, this dream, was too real to be comfortable. Maybe there was a meaning to his dream?

He began to crawl forward. There had to be an exit somewhere. The problem was merely where was it located.

The darkness seemed to disagree with his attempts to leave. It got thicker, pushing against his back. He was forced down by the dark force, but he forged on. He was barely moving, sliding his hands and knees across the dark film.

He kept going; the only thing keeping him up was how he knew, for a fact, that he needed to find an exit. Luke had no idea why or where, he just knew he needed it. A gut feeling, an instinct you can’t ignore.

Moving was only becoming harder. Luke had to focus on every movement. ‘Right hand, right foot, left hand, left foot, right, left, ’ He continually instructed himself.

The pressure of the darkness strengthened again. The pressure against his back causing his arms and legs to shake. The darkness only became heavier, causing him to shake even more.

‘My muscles are failing me…’

The realization came too late. He collapsed. The darkness surrounded him and welcomed him into its cold embrace. It seemed to be mocking him, as if saying ‘Welcome to your death.’

Luke didn’t like the feeling of this dark force, but it had him in its grasp. Squeezing him, tightening around his neck. He was finding it hard to breathe for the unwelcomed darkness was there to stay.

‘Can you die in a dream?’ Luke thought to himself as his eyes widened in fear. Was that possible? Frightened, he began to claw at the dark force around him. If only he could tear it away, somehow break free.

“G-Go away,” Luke gasped in annoyance as his hands failed to clear the dark force. ‘This cannot be happening,’ he thought in complete disbelief. He had lost, this was the end. He was going to find out if you really could die in a dream.

Suddenly, far off to his right, a bright light appeared. The exit! Luke rejoiced mentally as the darkness’s grip was loosened from surprise. This was his chance. He immediately began to struggle towards the light.

Why was the light retreating every time he moved forward?

“Not cool,” Luke hissed in irritation. He had to reach the light, but it seemed so impossible. The darkness was still there, still present. His movements were limited but he kept moving forward.

He only wanted to reach the light. Touch it to receive some strength. He longed for the light to remove the darkness, allow him to breathe properly and move freely. Was that too much to ask for?

The boy stretched his right hand out in front of him, trying to touch the light in the distance. If only the distance between the two would shrink. A small smile appeared on his face, the light wasn’t retreating as fast.

Believing he could catch-up with the light and with sudden strength, he forged forward. Luke ignored the darkness as he reached for the light. The light soon surged through him, dispelling the darkness from within.

Once the darkness was gone, he was left in blinding light, panting from the effort. He had made it… now what? Slowly, Luke was gaining control of his breath, but he still had no idea what to do next. Before he could think of anything he heard a voice.

It seemed to come from everywhere and nowhere at once. “See you tomorrow night,” the melody like voice said. The voice sounded so pleasant, but the words froze him in fear. Why would this voice be seeing him tomorrow?

On second thought, what was this voice? If it was the darkness, he was very much convinced he did not want to encounter it again. He couldn’t dwell on his thoughts for too long, for eventually the voice started again.

“You will definitely find it interesting on this side.”

The voice ended. Luke heard the voice say a whole thirteen words to him. His life had been changed and the voice only gave him thirteen words and no warning about the danger. The light was leaving now and he found himself waking up.

A loud bang lifted him from his drowsy thoughts. In front of him was a large textbook and above him was the face of his not-so-happy-teacher. “Do not fall asleep during my class!” the teacher scolded him.

Following after his words was a ripple of laughter and giggles as Luke bowed his head. “S-Sorry,” he stuttered. The teacher ignored his apology and returned to teaching the class.

The rest of class period, Luke had a hard time paying attention. His mind wandered to the strange dream. It seemed that the darkness could have actually killed him. The words spoken in the light scared him as well.

What was going to happen when he went asleep again?

 

[HypnoticChairman]

The last paragraph of the prologue sounds like a cheesy ending of a radio show. I can imagine the sentence "Find out next week, on...." coming right at the end, lol. Just a little observation. Other than that and a few clarity issues, I enjoyed it.

Now to read the next part.