Telling a Friend they are not Useless

L

liljes

Aspiring Trainer
Member
Ok this is what my friend just told me: I was here at home when my dad came in and the very first thing he said was "are you playing freaking games again? Jesus Christ what is wrong with you get a freaking life this is all you do I should just ground you but I dont know how you'd live" so I said wow thanks and went down stairs and I've been thinking about how much a useless human being I really am ."

How can I cheer him up? I don't like seeing my friends upset... :( And how can I convince him that he isn't useless?
 
Tell him: if you aren't important, then why were you ever created? (only if he is religous.)Everyone is unique in their own way; he is the only person like him in the universe. Let him know that people care about him (you , other friends, etc.). That's the best I can do now. I don't know how serious it is (suicide level, alcohol/drug abuse level, or just lower depression level). If it worsens, take him to a doctor because depression is a mental illness that can be curesd.

~JTE~
 
Start trying to use proper spelling and grammar. That always cheers intelligent people up. ;D Honestly, I'd highly recommend taking him to a mental health institute (your friend). Get him checked out. People who are that sensitive must have some form of mental illness... If anything, build up self esteem by working on some form of project that requires him as a keystone. If he is unable to do even that, once again, take him to a mental health place. If the problem worsens, I'd highly recommend you help him by recording and reporting child abuse. Getting one's annoying father taken away by the law is lots of fun... ;D Just be normal and be cool. If you are acting as a superior figure to help cheer him up, you will appear overbearing.
 
That wasn't my spelling or grammar by the way lol, it was an exact quote from my friend. And the reason it's like that is because he sent that to me on his phone to facebook and it auto corrects everything. But ya, I'll try all this stuff, I don't think he's mentally unstable though.
 
^Wow, just, wow... You want liljes to say to his friend:"Well, hey. You are too sensitive, and that is why I am going to bring you to a... Mental health place! I am sure you will feel more confident about yourself after the trip! See, this is how good friends help. Oh, I forgot. You can call the cops and tell them that your dad made you fell bad. Hehehe, that will be fun, even though you will feel even worse!"

Come on, Zero. I respect what you have said and the advices you have given but, don t you think it is too much?

@liljes
What you can say to your friend to cheer him up would be what he has done before that is, in his opinion, useful. And then, you jump into the general fact that everybody has their quality and good sides. And finally, to regain the relationship between his dad and him, you can tell him that his dad is saying that because he cares about him (but the way he said it wasn t so apropriate). Go down the street and ask a random guy:"Hello, did you that I play video games everyday?" He is going to say:" I don t care!"
 
I think he's seriously going through depression, and I heard it absolutely kills and drains you emotionally. Seriously, take home to a doctor, even if he doesn't want to. Untreated depression symptoms can lead to suicide, and I don't think you want your friend to die.

Btw, if the bad grammer was meant for me, it doesn't help that this is my iPod Touch, so the touch buttons are so small and it often auto corrects things I don't want to.

Oh it seems I've missed a part. This whole thing was caused partly by his dad. If you ask me, both of them need help. The father may be going through a rough time and taking his anger out on loved ones. If not, this could be child abuse.
 
Sorry to be blunt, but aside from therapy, the only way for your friend to get out of this state of depression is talk out his issues with his father. My dad gave and still gives me heck all the time for being into Pokemon (and more recently, furry fandom). For the most part, I just shut it, but when he starts on with the derrogatory comments, that's when I finally took him aside and let him know what-for that I sick and tired of him picking on me. He hasn't said much since I started that (though he still chuckles a bit behind my back, I hear, but not as bad as him saying stuff right to my face...and trust me, they're by far worse than anything your friend probably got). If he can't settle this on his own, he'll have to seek professional help.
 
^ All of that or tell your friend to stop playing some many freakin' video games. Listen, my parents are amazing people but they have gotten super pissed before about getting addicted to video games or the internet etc. and i have found the best way to defeat such a problem is simply stop playing so many video games. If your friend's dad is constantly ragging on your friend for playing too many video games its probably because he is playing too many video games /obvious. How old is your friend? If 14 below, than yeah his dad telling him to get a life is seriously harsh but if he is 15 and old than maybe not. Your friend could have a job, a car, a girl friend etc. and he doesnt because of video games. If your friend isnt addicted to video games then just give him a pep talk and he'll be fine.
 
No, you people don't understand. My friend is 16 and he rarely plays video games, his dad just rips on him whenever he gets the chance. He is actually very abusive and will scream and swear at him even if I'm around. His favorite words are swear words, he says the eff word every second word of every sentence, about things that make it absolutely unnecessary. And he is actually his step father, his real dad doesn't live with him. In fact, a few days ago my friend and his dad got into a fight and his dad began pushing him and threw him into his bed, I know it's abuse but I just don't know what to do. I'm scared that he'll hate me if I tell someone, because he for some strange reason gets offended whenever someone says anything against his dad... I just don't get it.
 
liljes, i know how your friends feels, i have a dad who goes psycho. If he hardly plays video games, if he his dad gets angry and abusive tell somebody, because that isn't right.
 
No one is useless, everyone has something they're really good at. Think about what his is and try to point it out to him. Maybe get him to talk to his Dad and try to sort the issues out, or just even stand up for himself.
 
If his dad is abusing him for every little thing he does, then he really should be reported. Maybe a responsible adult could help you with it (possibly a school teacher), as they may be one of the best helpers. If not, maybe his dad should be recommended to go to anger management classes, or see a psychiatrist. That's the best help I can give for now.
 
Hmm... After reading about this a bit more, it sounds like the kid's stepdad is just upset that his stepson is going to become a lifeless nerd than anything else (and I believe a few others came to this conclusion several times before me...sorry, I just skim through other posts, without reading everything). I mean, heck, if it's causing that much of a fuss for him, he should just stop playing video games altogether (or at least try and get it in while his stepdad isn't around). There are a lot of better activities he can do (writing, reading, sports).
 
^Exactly how do you know he has an Xbox? And I agree with those who think his stepdad should go to someone. It doesn't sound like liljes' friend is doing anything out of the ordinary to upset his dad.
 
It was a figure of speech. It meant that he should actually solve his problem of game addiction. His father shouldn't have handled it like that, but he had probably been keeping it inside of him for a while.
 
Liljes already told everyone his friend doesn't play video games very often. Do you even READ the posts?
 
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