Contest PokéBeach Create-A-Card: July 2017 - Johto PokéDex - Results Are Up!

Discussion in 'Creative Works' started by bbninjas, Jul 1, 2017.

  1. bbninjas Ready or Not!
    bbninjas

    Advanced Member Member

    Text-Based Results

    Judge: @NinjaPenguin

    Judge's Note:
    This month, the cards were very nice and creative. I saw many new, interesting effects and great ideas showcased this month, and I hope to see more of them in the future. Wording, unfortunately, was a large issue. There were no entries this month that got a perfect score in wording, and many of them fell short because of small errors (capitalization, italicization, and especially accenting e in Pokémon). Use references. There are many cards out there that can help you find the right wording for your attack, so make use of what you have. It’s sad that I saw so many people mess up on the GX rule, since it is so easy to copy/paste it from some online resource. We also have a great resource if you want to check for small errors: The “Common Wording Errors” Compilation. In the future, if you want to post your entry early in the month, I recommend you wait and keep it saved in a document somewhere. That way, you can look over it in a couple of weeks to see if you have any errors that need correcting. Finding and correcting those wording errors with getting an editing penalty can easily can be the difference between 1st place and 4th place. I provided references for obscure wording errors I found, but if you want me to explain any of your other wording errors, feel free to PM me about them. Now then, without further ado, let’s get to the judging.

    1. Thegrovylekid’s Pichu
    Pichu Lv.9 HP: 50 [L]
    Basic
    [​IMG]
    NO. 172 Tiny Mouse Pokémon HT: 1'00" WT: 4.4 lbs
    Poké-POWER: Baby Evolution
    Once during your turn (before your attack), you may put Pikachu from your hand onto Pichu (this counts as evolving Pichu) and remove all damage counters from Pichu.

    [C] Parallel Recharge
    Count the number of Energy cards attached to your opponent's Active Pokémon. Search your discard pile for that many Energy cards and attach them to 1 of your Pokémon.

    The electric pouches on its cheeks are still small. They cannot store much electricity yet.

    Weakness: [F] +10
    Resistance: [M] -20
    Retreat: [C]
    Let’s hope this Pichu sparks off a great competition, shall we?

    Wording Errors:

    Baby Evolution:
    -(before your attack) should be italicized [-1 Point]

    Parallel Charge:
    -”Search your discard pile for up to that many Energy cards” [-1 Point] (Reference: Stormfront Pichu)

    Creativity: 10/20
    As you know very well, Baby Evolution has been seen before, so I can’t give you any credit on that. Parallel Charge is an interesting punishment for opponent, which I enjoy a lot.

    Wording: 13/15
    Mostly clean; nice work.

    Believability: 15/15
    Very nice power level. It gets powerful in the late game, when you should have already set up, but still works in the early game. You also can’t abuse it with Special Energy, as there was a weak Special Energy pool in Gen. 4. Babies generally have free attacks, but it’s hypocritical to want you to use something besides Baby Evolution and still penalize you for this.

    The card’s fine, but I want to see a bit more (i.e. something that isn't forced into having Baby Evolution) from you, especially after seeing the great stuff you come up with in your fakes thread. In the future, I recommend you really push yourself by using new and strange Pokémon.

    Final Score: 38/50

    2. Lord o da rings’s Shuckle GX
    Shuckle GX HP: 170 - Grass
    Basic Pokémon
    [​IMG]
    NO. 213 Mold Pokémon HT: 2'0" WT: 45.2 lbs.

    Ability: Bulletproofing
    This Pokémon takes 40 less damage from attacks (after applying Weakness and Resistance).

    [G] Shell Ram 20
    Flip a coin. If heads, the Defending Pokémon cannot attack during your opponent's next turn.

    [C]
    Berry Juicing GX
    Search your deck for up to 3 Berry Juice, reveal them, and put them into your hand. Then, shuffle your deck.

    Weakness: [R] x 2
    Resistance: None
    Retreat: [C][C]

    Pokémon GX Rule: When your Pokémon-GX is knocked out, your opponent takes 2 Prize Cards.
    A Shuckle? I’m getting ready for the stall tactics already.

    Wording Errors:

    Shell Ram:
    -Replace cannot with can’t. [-1 Point]

    Berry Juicing GX:
    -Missing GX attack rule. [-2 Points]

    Other:
    -Capitalize Knocked Out in GX rule. [-1 Point]
    -Don’t capitalize “cards” in GX rule. [-1 Point]

    Creativity: 13/20
    Bulletproofing is not very new. Shell Ram is fine, not too exciting. I like Berry Juicing, though I have concerns about how it would work that I’ll talk about later. I also enjoy that you took Shuckle’s defensive nature and made a card based around it.

    Wording: 10/15
    Most of the wording errors came because you weren’t fully acclimated with GXs. Fix that next time, and you should be good.

    Believability: 11/15
    Shell Ram’s damage is very low (Swellow GUR has a better version of Shell Ram for a better energy cost and still will never be close to being played by the most casual of players). Berry Juice will obviously never be printed, seeing as its effect was an ACE SPEC not too long ago, but the attack is fine, if a bit underwhelming (N undoes your GX attack easily and there are a billion ways to search for trainer cards in the current format). -1 Point because there shouldn't be Dex stats on GXs.

    Unfortunately, the card stalled out a bit this time. In the future, be sure to spruce up your cards with some more unique effects.

    Final Score: 34/50

    3. Thflame’s Ho-oh GX
    Ho-Oh-GX - Colorless - 180 HP
    Basic

    Ability: Regenerator
    Whenever this Pokemon becomes one of your benched Pokemon after being your active Pokemon, you may attach one basic energy from your discard pile to this Pokemon. If you do, remove 6 damage counters from this Pokemon.

    [C][C][C] Rainbow Burn 70x
    Discard all energy attached to this Pokemon. This attack does 70 damage for each different type of basic energy discarded.

    [R][W][L] Sacred Ash GX
    Your opponent takes the top card of their deck and adds it, face down, to their Prize cards. You may not use this attack if your opponent hasn't taken any Prize cards. (You can't use more than one GX attack in a game.)

    Pokemon-GX rule: When your Pokemon-GX is Knocked Out, your opponent takes 2 Prize cards.

    Weakness: Lightning
    Resistance: Fighting (-20)
    Retreat Cost: 2
    Theflame’s Ho-oh? Makes sense, given that Ho-oh is a fire type.

    Wording Errors:

    Regenerator:
    -Once during your turn (before your attack) is needed, as it could otherwise be abused with cards like Lysandre. [-2 Points]
    -Replace whenever with if. [-1 Point]
    -Replace “becomes one of” with “was”. [-1 Point]
    -Replace “after being” with “and became”. [-1 Point]
    -Switch Benched and Active. [-1 Point]
    -Capitalize Benched. [-1 Point]
    -Capitalize Active. [-1 Point]
    -Capitalize Energy. [-.75 Points]
    -Accent e in Pokémon. X5 [-2.5 Points]
    -Energy cards are referred to as Energy when attached. [-1 Point]
    -Replace “remove 6 damage counters” with “heal 60 damage”. [-1 Point]

    Rainbow Burn:
    -Capitalize Energy. [-.75 Points]
    -Accent e in Pokémon. [-.5 Points]
    -Energy is referred to as a Energy card when not attached. [-1 Point]
    -Specify that “you discarded in this way”. [-1 Point]

    Sacred Ash GX:
    -No commas around face down. (Reference: Rotom Dex) [-.5 Points]

    Other:
    -Italicize GX in the GX rule. [-1 Point]

    Creativity: 17/20
    Regenerator and Rainbow Burn are very good attacks with nice synergy too! I especially love the uniqueness of Regenerator. Sacred Ash is also pretty cool, seeing as we haven’t seen that effect in a while.

    Wording: 0/15
    Unfortunately, the wording for Regenerator dragged it down a lot. Good work on the other ones though!

    Believability: 13/15
    Regenerator is powerful, considering how many switching cards are in the format, but the attack having such an awkward energy cost balances it out. Sacred Ash is pretty underpowered, as there are too many setbacks to using it. When your opponent can take a KO on you for multiple prizes next turn, adding one for three attachments with a restriction is weak.

    Although the score may seem low, I actually loved the card itself! If you polish your wording up for next month, you could be a real contender.

    Final Score: 30/50

    4. GekkisaiDaiNi’s Celebi GX
    Basic Celebi-GX HP110[G]

    Ability Time Flies
    Whenever one of your Benched Pokemon becomes your Active Pokemon, you may remove all damage counters from your old Active Pokemon. If you do, your turn ends.

    [.] Time's Memory
    If this Pokemon is in your discard pile, you may use this attack instead of attacking with your Active Pokemon. Put 3 damage counters on your opponent's Pokemon in any way you like. If this Pokemon isn't in your discard pile, this attack does nothing.

    [G] Speed Through-GX
    During your next turn, your Pokemon can evolve during the first turn you play those Pokemon. (You can only use one GX attack per game.)

    Weakness: [R]x2 Resistance: Retreat: [C]
    It’s about time I get to judging this Celebi, isn’t it?

    Wording Errors:

    Time Flies:
    -Once during your turn (before your attack) is needed, as it could otherwise be abused with cards like Lysandre and attacks like Donphan PLS’s Spinning Turn. [-2 Points]
    -Replace whenever with if. [-1 Point]
    -Remove Benched, and replace it with a “was on the Bench” after Pokémon (also add an and after this clause, as it won’t make sense otherwise). [-1.5 Points]
    -Replace becomes with became. [-1 Point]
    -Add “this turn” after Active Pokémon. [-1 Point]
    -Accent e in Pokémon. x2 [-1 Point]

    Time’s Memory:
    -Accent e in Pokémon. x3 [-1.5 Points]

    Speed Through GX:
    -Accent e in Pokémon. x2 [-1 Point]
    -GX attack rule is “can’t use more than one”, not “can only use one.” [-1 Point]
    -GX attack rule is “in a game”, not “per game.” [-1 Point]

    Other:
    -No GX rule. [-1 Point]

    Creativity: 19/20
    All of your effects are unique and interesting, and overall well designed. I especially love Time Flies, as it has a great sacrifice for a great reward.

    Wording: 2/15
    The errors are mostly small things compounded over time. Just be sure to check the minor details in the future.

    Believability: 11/15
    f you’ve used a GX attack, you literally can’t attack with this Pokémon in play, which I don’t think would ever happen. In addition, 110 HP is very low for the current era. The ability would also be really powerful in a deck like Wailord, where you don’t attack at all (and therefore don’t care about your turn ending). In the TCG, free attacks tend to be reserved for Alolan Pokémon, but considering the effect, I can forgive it. I would also note that since you need Grass energy to use the GX attack, it becomes irrelevant in Expanded due to FoGP, but it was banned after you created this card, so you’re safe from this criticism.

    The wording really hurt you this time. Next time, double check your work to see if you’re missing anything.

    Final Score: 32/50

    5. Lunarwork’s Lugia GX
    Basic - Lugia GX - HP 190 [C/W]

    Ability- Hydro Guard
    All of your [W] Pokemon in play get +10 HP for
    every benched [C] Pokemon your opponent has.

    [C][C]- Sky Strike -40
    Discard an Energy Card attached to this Pokemon.
    If you do, shuffle 3 Energy Cards from your discard
    pile into your deck.

    [W][W][C][C]- Ultra Stormcharge GX -300
    Discard this Pokemon and all cards attached to it.
    (You can't use more than one GX attack in a game.)

    Weakness- [L] x2
    Resistance- [F] -20
    Retreat- [C][C]

    Pokemon-GX Rule-
    When a Pokemon-GX has been Knocked Out,
    your opponent takes 2 Prize Cards.

    For some reason, I always associated Lugia with the moon, so it’s fitting that the Lunar person picked it...

    Wording Errors:

    Hydro Guard:
    -Accent e in Pokémon. X2 [-1 Point]
    -Replace all with each. [-1 Point]
    -Replace every with each. [-1 Point]
    -Remove Benched. [-1 Point]
    -Replace “your opponent has” with “on your opponent’s Bench”. [-1 Point]

    Sky Strike:
    -Accent e in Pokémon. [-.5 Points]
    -Energy cards are referred to as Energy when attached. [-1 Point]
    -The effect is not optional, so “if you do” is unnecessary. [-1 Point]
    -Don’t capitalize card. [-1 Point]

    Ultra Stromcharge:
    -Accent e in Pokémon. [-.5 Points]
    -Needs “(this does not count as a Knock Out)”. [-2 Points]

    Other:
    -Replace “a” with “your” in the GX rule. [-1 Point]
    -Replace “has been” with “is” in the GX rule. [-1 Point]
    -Italicize GX in the GX rule. [-1 Point]

    Creativity: 15/20
    Hydro Guard is an effect that I really enjoy, and wish was incorporated in the real game. Sky Strike is fun and interesting, not too exciting. Ultra Stormcharge has been seen before, but is fairly cool.

    Wording: 1/15
    Although you had a lot of errors, you are slowly getting better. Just keep getting better, and you'll be there in no time.

    Believability: 10/15
    There seem to be no connections between the names and effects in any way. When it comes to dualtyping, adding colorless has absolutely no utility in Standard. Also, Lugia is not actually a Water type, but considering it has been depicted as one in the TCG, I can forgive you for that. Ultra Stormcharge is pretty weak, considering it has a very big drawback and is hard to setup, as you must discard your energy while powering up to it.

    Edited: -2

    The score may not reflect it, but I see a lot of improvement in your faking skills. Keep up the good work!

    Final Score: 25/50

    6. P3DS’s Xatu
    Xatu - Psychic/Colorless - HP 90
    Stage 1 - Evolves from Natu

    Ability:
    Birds of a Feather
    The attacks of each of your Pokémon (excluding this Pokémon) that shares a type with this Pokémon do 20 more damage to your opponent's Active Pokémon (before applying Weakness and Resistance).

    [C][C] Flock Together 20x
    This attack does 20 times the number of your Benched Pokémon that shares a type with this Pokémon.

    Weakness: Lightning (x2)
    Resistance: Fighting (-20)
    Retreat: [C]

    Pokédex Information:
    Once it begins to meditate at sunrise, the entire day will pass before it will move again.
    Wait, Xatu’s in Gen 2? I could swear it was one of those extra evolutions they added in Gen 4...

    Wording Errors:

    Birds of a Feather:
    -Do not italicize (excluding this Pokémon). [-1 Point]

    Creativity: 17/20
    The attacks are clever, though not fully unique, there’s a lot of nice synergy, and you even managed to make colorless dual typing useful! Very nice!

    Wording: 14/15
    Mostly clean. Good job!

    Believability: 13.5/15
    This certainly seems like a viable deck, but not too OP. It could be a bit too powerful in something like Mega Ray, but Lurantis, which is similar, isn’t used at all. I’m cautiously taking off half a point because this could be a bit too good with AOR Eeveelutions. -1 Point for missing Dex Stats.

    Edited: -2

    Honestly, I fell in love with this card when I first saw it. Your research into creating this card impresses me a ton, and it incorporates the elements of Xatu brilliantly. Great work!

    Final Score: 42.5/50.

    7. DashKing’s Ursaring GX
    [
    Ursaring GX HP 200

    Stage 1: evolved from Teddiursa

    Honey Gather:

    Once during your turn (before your attack), you may search your deck for a special energy card and attach it to your Pokémon in any way you like. (shuffle your deck afterwards)

    [C][C] Special Slash 30x

    This attack does 30 times the number of special energy attached to all of your Pokémon

    [C][C] Solo Swipe GX 230-

    This attack does 230 damage minus 20 for each of your benched Pokémon

    Pokedex Entry: In the forests inhabited by Ursaring, it is said that there are many streams and towering trees where they gather food. This Pokémon walks through its forest gathering food every day.

    Retreat: [C][C]

    Weakness [F]x2

    Resistance: None ]
    Am I the only one surprised that someone with “dash” in their name decided to pick the “Hibernator Pokémon” of all the choices they were given?

    Wording Errors:

    Honey Gather:
    -Italicize (before your attack). [-1 Point]
    -Capitalize Special Energy. [-.75 Points]
    -”Attach it to 1 of your Pokémon” [-1 Point]
    -”Shuffle your deck afterward.” is replaced by “Then, shuffle your deck.” in SuMo. [-1 Point]
    -No parentheses around shuffling clause. [-1 Point]
    -Add a period at the end. [-.5 Points]

    Special Slash:
    -Capitalize Special Energy. [-.75 Points]
    -Replace number with amount. [-1 Point]
    -Add a period at the end. [-.5 Points]

    Solo Swipe GX:
    -”Minus 20 damage.” [-1 Point]
    -Capitalize Benched. [-1 Point]
    -Add a period at the end. [-.5 Points]
    -Missing GX attack rule. [-2 Points]

    Other:
    -Missing a type. [-2 Points]
    -Missing GX rule. [-1 Point]

    Creativity: 14/20
    Honey Gather and Special Slash are slight edits of past attacks/abilities, though well themed. Solo Swipe GX has -, which I enjoy. It’s also pretty unique.

    Wording: 0/15
    Just a lot of small errors that could easily be fixed for next time.

    Believability: 11/15
    The synergy is way too good. Four Ursaring can add 120 damage in one turn. Also, the Special Energy focus makes it really powerful as a support too, as you could potentially add 8 energy with DCE. The Retreat Cost is a bit low compared to typical Ursaring. Solo Swipe is a very good power level. -1 Points because it shouldn’t have a Dex Entry.

    Edited: -2

    The card unfortunately fell flat this time. Next time, be sure to check the small details, especially when you edit the card.

    Final Score: 25/50

    8. NinJamezor’s Houndoom GX
    [BASIC] Houndoom GX HP200 [R]

    [​IMG]

    [ABILITY] Eerie Howls
    Once during your turn (before your attack), you may discard a card from your hand. If you do, discard a random card from your opponent’s hand.


    [R][R] Past Enemies 20+
    This attack does 20 more damage for each Supporter card in your opponent's discard pile.

    [R][R] Everlasting Burn GX 150
    Your opponent's Active Pokémon is now Burned. Your opponent flips 2 coins instead of 1 between turns. If either of them is tails, that Pokémon is still Burned.

    Weakness: [W] x2
    Resistance:
    Retreat Cost: [C]
    (Ur)
    [When 1 of your Pokemon-GX is Knocked Out, your opponent takes 2 Prize cards.]
    Will this Houndoom spell doom for your other competitors? Let’s find out:

    Wording Errors:

    Everlasting Burn GX:
    -Missing GX attack rule. [-2 Point]

    Other:
    -Remove “1 of” in the GX rule. [-1 Point]

    Creativity: 13/20
    Eerie Howls is pretty new. Past Enemies and Everlasting Burn are very reminiscent of Garbodor GUR and Darkrai Promo, as you mentioned yourself.

    Wording: 12/15
    Prefect. Great job!

    Believability: 14/15
    Eerie Howls can be very good, especially with Red Card. That would be fixed if your opponent could choose what they discard. The rest of it has a fine power level, though Everlasting Burn is pretty bad as KO GX moves go.

    Edited: -2

    The card is good, but not great. Next time, try to use more effects that are completely unique.

    Final Score: 37/50

    9. TheFlyingPidove’s Corsola
    Corsola / Basic / HP: 80 / Fighting

    [​IMG]
    [ NO. 222 | Coral Pokémon | HT 2'oo" | WT 11.0 lbs ]

    [Ability] Branch Regrow
    Once during your turn (before your attack), you may return a Basic Energy from this Pokémon to your hand. If you do, heal 40 damage from this Pokémon.

    [F][F] Coral Breaker [10+]
    You may put as many damage counters on each of your Corsola you have in play as you like. This attack does 10 more damage for each damage counter you put on each of your Corsola in this way.

    Weakness: [G] x2
    Resistance:
    Retreat Cost: [C][C][C]
    [These beautiful Pokémon are not able to live in polluted waters. Another reason why many waters should be cleaned.]
    It really got me when you said “Back into the trash you go.~” That probably because I had forgot Corsola existed until then.

    Wording Errors:

    Branch Regrow:
    -Italicize (before your attack). [-1 Point]
    -Do not capitalize basic. [-1 Point]
    -”Attached to this Pokémon”, not “from this Pokémon.” [-1 Point]

    Coral Breaker:
    -”Each of” is not needed. X2 [-1.5 Points]
    -”You have in play” is not needed. [-1 Point]

    Other:
    Height uses oo instead of 00. [-1 Point]

    Creativity: 16/20
    Coral Breaker is a great effect, and Branch Regrow is interesting too. The card also ties into flavor very well.

    Wording: 8.5/15
    Just small errors that you’ll easily be able to fix next time. Just scan a bit closer before you post.

    Believability: 13/15
    The Retreat Cost is certainly large for Corsola. The ability is usable, but not great. The attack is mostly fine since it is basically one time, as it’s annoying to heal without being a possible Rough Seas target.

    This card was really nice! Fix up your wording mistakes and you could easily get one of the top spots next month.

    Final Score: 37.5/50

    10. John InCENAroar’s Ampharos GX
    Ampharos GX - [L] - HP 240
    Stage 2 - Evolves from Flaaffy

    Ability: Static
    If the Defending Pokemon tries to attack during your opponent’s next turn, your opponent flips a coin. If tails, that attack does nothing

    [L][L][C][C] Thunder Frenzy 140
    You may discard all [L] energy attached to this pokemon. If you do, this attack does 70 damage to each of your opponent’s benched pokemon.


    [L][L][C] Discharge GX
    This attack does 40 damage to each of your opponent’s pokemon. If the damage from this attack reduces any of your opponent’s pokemon to 80 HP or less, that pokemon is knocked out. (You cannot use more than 1 GX attack per game.)

    Weakness: Fighting (x2)
    Resistance: Metal (-20)
    Retreat: [C][C]
    Will this Ampharos shock me, or will it just be Static? Let’s find out.

    Wording Errors:

    Static:
    -”If the Defending Pokémon tries to attack during your opponent’s next turn,” needs to be replaced with a separate clause. [-3 Points]
    -Add a period at the end. [-1 Point]

    Thunder Frenzy:
    -Capitalize Energy [-1 Point]
    -Capitalize Benched [-1 Point]
    -Capitalize Pokémon. X2 [-1 Point]
    -Accent e in Pokémon. X2 [-1 Point]
    -Missing (Don't apply Weakness and Resistance for Benched Pokémon.) [-1.5 Points]

    Discharge:
    -Capitalize Pokémon. X3. [-1.5 Points]
    -Accent e in Pokémon. X3 [-1.5 Points]
    -Missing (Don't apply Weakness and Resistance for Benched Pokémon.) [-1.5 Points]
    -”Pokémon’s HP to 80 or less.”, not “Pokémon to 80 HP or less.” [-1 Point]
    -Replace cannot with can’t. [-1 Point]

    Other:
    -Missing GX rule. [-1 Point]

    Creativity: 15/20
    Static is interesting too as an ability; we haven't seen it in a while. Thunder Frenzy is also interesting, and Discharge is a cool effect.

    Wording: 0/15
    There are a lot of errors here. When you edit your card, be sure to check for small syntax errors, as they are the main cause of you losing points.

    Believability: 10/15
    Static seems very OP, considering how babies with that rule were useful many formats ago. Thunder Frenzy seems too OP, considering you may only need to discard 2 energy to do huge damage (Landorus EX, one of the best attackers not too long ago, had a similar attack and only did damage to the active when the energy was discarded). Discharge is fine, though automatic Shaymin killing makes me cautious, since one attack can take you all of your prizes against the right deck.

    Edited: -2

    Lesson of the day: When you edit, make sure you take the time to edit out all of the wording errors.

    Final Score: 23/50

    11. Taschen88’s Kingdra
    Kingdra - Dragon type - 140HP
    stage 2 - Evolves from Seadra
    [ NO. 230 | Dragon Pokémon | HT: 5'11" | WT: 335.1 lbs ]
    [​IMG]
    Ability: King's Order
    The attacks and Abilities of your [N] Pokémon can't be affected by attacks or Abilities of your opponent's Pokémon.

    [C] Resolute Beam
    This attack does 60 damage to 1 of your opponent's Pokémon-EX or Pokémon-GX.
    (Don't apply Weakness and Resistance for Benched Pokémon.)

    [W][L] Dragonstream 40x
    Move all Basic W or L from this Pokémon to 1 of your Benched Pokémon.
    This attack does 40 damage times the amount of Energy moved in this way.

    Weakness - [Y]
    Resistance - [ ]
    Retreat Cost - [C]
    For me, Kingdra’s just a painful reminder of the great evolutions added to Pokémon after their first game. Why can’t we have more Kingdra in the world?

    Wording Errors:

    King’s Order:
    -Add “Prevent all effects of” at the beginning (and remove the, to accommodate it). [-1 Point]
    -Replace of with “done to”. [-1 Point]
    -Remove “can't be affected by attacks or Abilities of” and replace it with “by”. [-1 Point]
    -Add “Remove any existing effects.” at the end. [-2 Points]

    Resolute Beam:
    -Italicize EX. [-1 Point]
    -Italicize GX. [-1 Point]
    -Italicize (Don't apply Weakness and Resistance for Benched Pokémon.). [-1 Point]

    Dragonstream:
    -Don’t capitalize Basic. [-1 Point]
    -Specify that it’s Energy being moved. [-1 Point]

    Other:
    Capitalize Stage 2. [-1 Point]

    Creativity: 16/20
    King’s Order is pretty original and creative; I like the ability keeping. Resolute Beam is fun. Dragonstream is pretty good too.

    Wording: 4/15
    Just small errors that will be easy to fix next time. Just take a bit more time ironing them out and you should be good.

    Believability: 14/15
    There’s a good power level in both the attacks and abilities. Resolute Beam is perhaps a bit too much, but it’s made up for by being a Stage 2. -1 Point because you’re missing a Dex Entry.

    I really like this kind of card! It’s one of those cards that look plain, but are intelligently made when you take a closer look.

    Final Score: 34/50

    12. Rainyman123’s Girafarig
    Girafarig HP 90 Colorless
    Basic Pokémon

    /Ability/ - Tail Reaction
    Whenever your opponent would put a Basic Pokémon from their hand onto their bench, put 2 damage counters on that Pokémon. You can only use 1 Tail Reaction Ability during your opponent's turn.

    [C][C] Palindromal Power
    You may either choose to put 2 damage counters on each of your opponent's Pokémon that already have damage counters on them or you may deal 50 damage to the Defending Pokémon.

    Its tail has a small brain of its own. Beware! If you get close, it may react to your scent by biting.

    Weakness: Fighting x2
    Resistance: None
    Retreat: 1
    A second palindromic Pokémon? How interesting!

    Wording Errors:

    Tail Reaction:
    -Capitalize Bench. [-1 Point]
    -Replace “would put” with “puts”. [-1 Point]
    -”You can’t use more than 1”, not “You can only use 1”. [-1 Point]

    Palindromal Power:
    -Precedent gives two options: it would either be formatted as “Choose 1:” or would not have “either choose”. [-1 Point]
    -Replace deal with do. [-1 Point]
    -Remove the second “you may.” [-1 Point]

    Creativity: 15/20
    Tail Reaction is a fun to see effect in ability form, which we haven’t seen it in before. For such an interesting name, Palindromal Power is really nothing special.

    Wording: 9/15
    These errors are mostly based on slight differences from precedent. Be sure to check what you write matches up with your references.

    Believability: 14/15
    The power level is fine, though Tail Reaction is not very useful when your opponent can choose which 1 Pokémon gets the damage. -1 Point because you’re missing Dex Stats.

    Edited: -2

    You are really close to getting a great score. Just be sure to check your wording for minor things, and you’ll do great!

    Final Score: 36/50

    13. Tails’s Togetic
    Togetic Fairy HP: 100
    Stage 1- Evolves from Togepi
    [​IMG]

    Ability: Follow Me
    Whenever your opponent plays a card that targets, or uses an attack that targets, you can shift the effect of that card or attack onto this Pokemon. (Togetic must have the corresponding card(s) to resolve any card effect.)

    [F] Friendship Gift
    Heal 20 damage from each of your Pokemon that have any damage counters on them

    [F] [F] [C] Toge-tastic! 30x
    This attack does 30 damage times the number of Togepi, Togetic, Togekiss/Togekiss EX on your bench

    Weakness - M x2
    Resistance - D -20
    Retreat Cost - [C]
    "Togetic is said to be a Pokémon that brings good fortune. When the Pokémon spots someone who is pure of heart, it is said to appear and share its happiness with that person."
    I always feel bad for poor Togetic. It was the always highest evolution of its line before Togekiss, but is now one of those forgotten Pokémon.

    Wording Errors:

    Follow Me:
    -Specify that it targets a Pokémon, and whose Pokémon it targets (just yours, or yours and your opponent’s). [-2 Points]
    -Replace can with may. [-1 Point]
    -Replace any with the. [-1 Point]
    -Replace the last “card” with “card’s”. [-.5 Points]
    -Accent e in Pokémon. [-.75 Points]

    Friendship Gift:
    -”That have any damage counters on them” is unnecessary, as you can’t heal any Pokémon without damage counters on them. [-2 Points]
    -Accent e in Pokémon. [-.75 Points]
    -Add a period at the end. [-.75 Points]

    Toge-Tastic!:
    -Add “your Benched” before Togepi. [-1 Point]
    -Replace “/” with “,and”. [-1 Point]
    -Add a dash between Togekiss and EX. [-1 Point]
    -Italicize EX. [-1 point]
    -Remove “on your Bench”. [-1 Point]
    -Add a period at the end. [-.75 Point]

    Creativity: 15/20
    Follow Me is a brilliant effect, which ties in very well to the in-game counterpart. Friendship Gift is nothing special. Toge-tastic is fun, but it’s an effect that seems to be in vogue from the faking community recently.

    Wording: 0.5/15
    These are all small wording errors that you can easily correct for next time. Just scan over your card once more before you post it.

    Believability: 9/15
    The power level is extraordinarily high for an NFE, making it not even worth evolving. 100 HP is also high. -1 Point for missing Dex Stats.

    The wording errors may make your score seem small, but I want you to know that Follow Me was my favorite effect in the entire competition. Keeping making effects like that and you’ll do great.

    Final Score: 26.5/50

    14. SneaselGenesis’s Sudowoodo
    Brock's Sudowoodo - 60 HP - Fighting
    Basic Pokémon

    [​IMG]
    Imitation Pokémon. Length: 3'11", Weight: 84 lbs.

    Pokémon Power: Treeplacement
    As long as Brock's Sudowoodo is Benched, if your Active Pokémon would be damaged by an attack, switch Brock's Sudowoodo with your Active Pokémon and do that damage to Brock's Sudowoodo instead. You can't use more than 1 Treeplacement Pokémon Power each turn.
    ___________________________________________________________________________________________________

    [F] Flail 10x
    Does 10 damages times the number of damage counters on Brock's Sudowoodo.

    Weakness - [W]
    Resistance - N/A
    Retreat Cost - [C][C][C]
    Although it always pretends to be a tree, its composition appears to be closer to a rock than a plant. LV. 27 #185
    Do I have really to get out my Wailmer Pail? I don’t want this Sudowoodo to block everyone from being able to view my judging.

    Wording Errors:

    Treeplacement:
    -Specify that it’s an opponent’s attack. [-1 Point]
    -Make the effect optional. [-1 Point]

    Creativity: 12/20
    Treeplacement is a very good effect, and one that I would love to see in the actual game. As I suspect you already know, Flail has been seen on Sudowoodo Neo Genesis, as has the W/R/RC/HP/Dex Entry. To me, that’s a bit too similar.

    Wording: 13/15
    You do Neo-era wording and you do it well. Good job!

    Believability: 14/15
    Treeplacement makes Flail much more powerful, as you can choose to specifically get hit by something that gets you the right amount of damage to attack for high amounts of damage next turn. Getting to 40/50 damage on a Basic for 1 energy somewhat consistently is powerful for the era.

    The card is very good, but I still want a bit more from you, as I know how much you can do. Next month, try to make effects that are completely new to the TCG.

    Final Score: 39/50

    15. AshCo’s Celebi ex
    Celebi ex 70HP [P]
    Basic
    [​IMG]

    (When a Pokemon-ex has been knocked out, your opponent takes 2 Prize cards)

    [Poké-POWER]: Double-Time
    Once during your turn (before your attack), you may flip a coin. If heads, your Active Pokémon may attack twice during this turn. (You still need the necessary energy to use each attack.) The second attack you choose does half the damage it would deal normally, rounded down (after applying weakness and resistance).

    [Poké-POWER]: Rewind
    Once during your turn (before your attack), you may discard an energy from one of your Pokémon. If you do, devolve one of your opponent's benched Pokémon and put the highest stage evolution card on it into his or her hand.

    [P] Memories Reborn 10+
    Does 10 damage plus 10 damage for each evolved Pokémon you have in play.

    Weakness-[P]
    Resistance-N/A
    Retreat Cost-[C]
    When was the last time I saw a lowercase “ex” on someone’s fakes? It’s a very nice change of pace.

    Wording Errors:

    Double-Time:
    -Needs “(If the first attack Knocks Out your opponent's Active Pokémon, you may attack again after your opponent chooses a new Active Pokémon.)” [-2 Points]
    -Capitalize Energy. [-.75 Points]
    -Capitalize Weakness. [-1 Point]
    -Capitalize Resistance. [-1 Point]

    Rewind:
    -Capitalize Energy. [-.75 Points]
    -Capitalize Benched. [-1 Point]
    -Correct wording for devolution in the ex era is “Remove the highest Stage Evolution card from the Defending Pokémon and put that card into his or her hand” (Reference: Holon Phantoms Mew ex). [-4 Points]

    Memories Reborn:
    -Capitalize Evolved. [-1 Point]

    Other:
    -In ex rule, accent e in Pokémon. [-1 Point]

    Creativity: 17/20
    Rewind is very smart, and Double-Time is good too. Memories Reborn isn’t ne, as I’m sure you know.

    Wording: 2.5/15
    A lot of the wording errors stem from tiny mistakes. Check the “Common Wording Errors” Compilation, and you should be good.

    Believability: 12/15
    There’s a reason TPCI never uses half damage, since it’s obnoxious to deal with. Also, with the potential for multiple Celebi, there is too great of a chance of being able to attack twice (you probably need to limit it to one Double-Time Poke-Power a turn). I’ll note that you chose a good era for Rewind, as there weren’t many hand disruption cards back in Gen 3 (and hand disruption would make Rewind much more powerful).

    It really isn’t unfortunate that there are so many wording errors, because I found your card smart and well conceived. I certainly want to see more of your fakes in the future!

    Final Score: 31.5/50

    16. Double o squirtle’s Honchkrow GX
    Honchkrow GX Stage 1 HP: 190 [D] (Evolves from Murkrow)

    Ability: Take Charge
    Once during your turn (before your attack), if 1 of your Pokémon was Knocked Out during your opponent’s last turn, you may switch your Active Pokémon with this Pokémon.

    [D][C] You Do It 60
    Switch this Pokémon with 1 of your Benched Pokémon.

    [D][D] Crony Call GX
    Search your deck for up to 5 Basic Pokémon and put them onto your Bench.

    Pokémon GX rule
    When your Pokémon GX is Knocked Out, your opponent takes 2 Prize Cards.

    Weakness: [L] x2 / Resistance: [P] -20 / Retreat: [C]
    Finally decided to make a card of your true form, huh? Let’s see how it is:

    Wording Errors:

    Take Charge:
    -Replace 1 with any. [-1 Point]
    -Change the order of “this Pokémon” and “your Active Pokémon”. [-1 Point]

    Crony Call GX:
    -Needs “Then, shuffle your deck.” [-2 Points]
    -Missing GX attack rule. [-2 Point]

    Other:
    -Don’t capitalize “cards” in GX rule. [-1 Point]

    Creativity: 14/20
    Although You Do It has been seen before, it has very good synergy with Take Charge, which is pretty unique. Crony Call is a new GX attack, though not that new overall.

    Wording: 8/15
    The mistakes you made are very easy to correct by referencing just a bit more with past attacks. Check a bit more, and you should be good.

    Believability: 13/15
    Crony Call GX has little to no use, as the big niche it would fill is allowing you to use a Turn 1 supporter not named Brigette, but you can’t get Honchkrow or pay for the attack on Turn 1. Finally, the Weakness and Resistance usually apply to one type of the Pokémon instead of both like on here.

    The card was good, but lacked a bit of that new attack energy. Next month, try to make an effect that I’ve never seen before.

    Final Score: 35/50

    3rd Place: Thegrovylekid's perky Pichu, with 38/50 points.
    2nd Place: SneaselGenesis’s sagacious Sudowoodo, with 39/50 points.
    1st Place: P3DS’s xenodochial Xatu, with 42.5/50 points.

    3rd Place: thegrovylekid’s perky Pichu, with 38/50 points.
    2nd Place: SneaselGenesis’s sagacious Sudowoodo, with 39/50 points.
    1st Place: P3DS’s xenodochial Xatu, with 42.5/50 points.
     


  2. TylerRVG The Cosmic rage of Astral Dwarfs from Aberdeen.
    TylerRVG

    Member

    Oh boy, half a point away from tied third place! Ah well, top marks for F&P and Aesthetics, and a decent creativity score is enough to leave me happy.

    Eh, I was under the impression that as long as "Misdreavus" was in the title, it counted as being called as such- and that the same applies to other variants like "Dark [mon]" or "[mon] EX" ect. Guess I don't know that much about the game.

    Congrats and good work to the winners + everyone else who got a score they're happy with!
     
  3. Card names are very strict in the Pokémon TCG and effects that reference a card's name do not, by default, extend to all cards that include that card's name unless a specific clarification is included in the effect's wording. If you wished, you could override this with wording similar to the following:

    To demonstrate this position, take Beedrill from Evolutions as an example, which has the following attack:

    Swarming Sting does not consider Beedrill-EX, M Beedrill-EX or Koga's Beedrill, etc. when calculating damage because these cards are not specifically named 'Beedrill'.

    I hope that clarifies my decision to deduct points in this instance :)
     
    TylerRVG likes this.
  4. professorlight Ice Queen
    professorlight

    Member

    Uh... yes, that was... intentional, of course, and I definitely didn't realize I forgot the blank holos after I had already posted the card, and I definitely didn't consider it was better to not lose two points for a feature only I seem to like.

    But speaking seriously, if you or anyone else has any ideas about how to improve that aspect of the holos, since it is true that in static image as they are they make reading a bit more difficult, any advice would be welcome; I love what I do with the designs, so that isn't going anywhere -even though heaven knows it's a chore to think and make, hence why it slipped past me this time, focused as I was on the illustration- nor is the sparkle, the sparkle stays.
    But, there could be better ways to use the holos, or different holos as well (I love what blui has done lately, for example, even if it couldn't quite as easily fit what I do) that I am not aware of.

    Done, done and done. I looked for references, but nothing quite like it had been done before, hence why I missed that huge clarification; you guessed it correctly, but, it was still missing.

    Oh, not you too. My terrible wording aside, we'd been having such a grand time, let's not open that can of worms.
     
  5. I probably should have added a bit more clarification here myself - I think, in this case, it would be fine to just switch the [W] and [L] over, so have [L] at the front and [W] at the back. This way, the [L] doesn't get lost in the background :)
     

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